Only speaking on behalf of myself, I’m certain there are other “clever types” out there: I’m not familiar with the song, so I don’t know exactly what sound you’re going for, all I can suggest is maybe boost the gain to get it closer to distortion, and perhaps add some slightly aggressive compression (>4:1) with high-ish MUG, just be careful what you’re sending to monitors. I did some quick Googling (how did that become a verb?!?) and it seems it’s a commonly asked question for cover bands, and common solutions include using specific mics and/or specific external fx units with certain presets. They all had the hi/low rolloff going on though. One guy actually wired an actual telephone handset into his console for use in the studio. Good luck with it.
